Feelings of discontent

I don't know what it is lately but I am so discontented. Do you ever have days or weeks like this? I am not sure if it is because our best friends moved away or what, but I am ready for a change!! 

Last month I had enough with my work at home job and I applied for a job at US Airways. I didn't hear back for a month and then I did. I had a casual phone interview and of course it was EVERYTHING that I want to do in a job. Only the job pays nearly 25% less than I make now and would require day care for Mason and an hour commute EACH way. Total no brainer, but they wanted me to come interview anyway. As I thought about the job, the thought that came over and over was, "There will be other jobs, but not other children." As I thought about ways to make it work, the thought came again, "there will be other jobs, but not other children." I am one of those people that needs to be told several times, and during the day, I "heard" that thought more than 5 times. I had to be obedient to the feelings I had. The next morning I sent and email removing my name from consideration for the job. It was if a HUGE weight was lifted from my shoulders. Am I content? Not really but I am praying that the feeling of contentment will come. In the meantime I am changing everything else that I can - redecorating the house, cutting my hair.... I did find a quote that I just LOVE: 

Be Content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.

I am trying to abide by it.

Trek thoughts

Last weekend Hayden participated in the Stake trek. They walked from the San Tan mountains to the new Gilbert temple. All Day Thursday, Friday and Saturday, my thoughts were about Hayden. Where he was? What he was doing? How he was enduring? On Friday morning I got a call from Jodi Sawyer and she said that they were in need of more water buckets. She said that the trekkers had run out of water the day before and were 2 hours late getting to camp. She said Hayden was doing great and he came into camp with a huge smile on his face. Facebook was crazy with comments from Mom wondering the same things as I was. It was only then that I had an epiphany.

I thought of those Moms in Europe and England who sent their children to join the Saints in Utah. They had no clue when or if they would ever seem them again. Those Mom's didn't know who they would be traveling with or how they would get to their final destination. Those were true sacrifices, ones that I am not sure I could have made. I knew Hayden was in good hands with our sweet Bishop and his trek Ma and Pa. I knew that I would pick him up at 3:30 on Saturday at the Stake Center. I knew that if something happened, I would get a phone call. I knew that Hayden would be fed each day. I knew that he was safe.

Sacrament meeting was all about the trek. The youth speakers talked about their experiences and what they learned. They talked about the women's pull - where only the women were allowed to pull the handcart up the hill. They talked about the example in the Book of Mormon and how the Anti-Nephi Lehies buried their weapons of sin and rebellion. They talked about their families and how they were bonded together. I cried the entire meeting. The Spirit was so strong and my testimony grew be listening to their experiences. I was thrilled that Hayden was able to go. I was even sad that I could not participate in such an amazing event.

I am thankful for the men and women who had enough faith to cross the plains and settle in Utah where they could worship as they pleased. I am not sure I could have done it, and I am thankful to be born at this time. The sacrifices they made... to bury their children and spouses along the way, to give up all their possessions... those are true sacrifices!!

LONG absence....

Sometimes I get the bug to read and sometimes I get the bug to write. I am in a writing mode so I thought I would revisit my blog. I have had a few thoughts lately that I want to write down. Not sure why, but sometimes writing can be therapy for the soul. I hope in my case it is. Life has been changing and I will try to catch you up in the coming days..... not sure how long I will stay blogging this time, but I will enjoy it while it lasts.

Back to Mexico - AGAIN!

Every year we go to Rocky Point in May. Dad trades his time shares for the Mayan Palace and we were thrilled to go again!!

The kids had fun swimming and body boarding. On Saturday it was SUPER windy and the waves were huge. Colby had to show the boys what to do. Thank goodness for awesome uncles. Mason was so exhausted on Sunday that he cuddled up on the couch and went to sleep.

Of course a trip to Mexico wouldn't be complete without a trip into town for some Thrifty Ice cream and some shopping. Cole was the sombrero model.....

Each of the kids bought something and we even stopped at the grocery store for some yummy tortillas. It hasn't even been a month and I am ready to go back. There is just something amazing about being at the beach!!

Happy 1st Birthday to Mason!!

We were in Rocky Point on Mason's first birthday so we celebrated a couple of weeks later.

The kids were super excited to put cake in Mason's face. That is the tradition around here. I think they were all surpised when he actually seemed to enjoy it. Mason is the only one who didn't scream when the cake was smashed in his face. Here he looks a little unsure of what just happened but he never cried. Instead he continued to eat the cake!

Even Grace got in on the chocolate cake.

Mason is still not walking but he did surprise us in Mexico by standing up by himself on his birthday. I have a feeling that walking is just around the corner. What would I do without my Mace?? He is a mama's boy and I am thankful that he came to our home. We are blessed to have him!

Spring Break in Rocky Point

This year for Spring Break we went to Rocky Point for a few days. Mitzi and I shared a condo and it worked out perfect. Here is where we stayed - Las Palomas!!

The kids had a ball and it was nice to relax in the Sun. Olivia had her hair done by a woman on the beach. Olivia sure looked like a beach bum with her dark skin and braids.

I promised the boys I would rent a jet ski for them while we were there. Even Olivia got in on the action. They, of course, loved it!!

Mason was happy to sit next to the pool and eat Oreos. Can you blame him?

I was shocked to see how much Mason liked the ocean.

Everyone hears the bad stories about Mexico, but it is like saying, "Harlem, NY is a dangerous city and has the highest murder rate in the country. So we better not go to Phoenix." Granted, I would not take my kids and cross the border at Juarez, but I feel very safe in Rocky Point and we have never had an issue. I am hoping to spend Fall Break there too.

Hayden's Eagle Board of Review

Today had his Eagle Board of Review. I think I was more nervous than he was. He asked

Adam Layton to introduce him to the board and then Todd Pacheco an Matt Riffey sat on the board as well as a guy from the Council. I am not sure what his name was but he was a cute little old man. Adam was good enough to give Hayden some pointers like make sure your arm is in a square when you do the Scout Law and Oath or they will stop you and make you start over. Hayden sailed through the review and he is officially an Eagle Scout.

People are amazed at Hayden's motivation and I would like to say it is ALL the wonderful parenting I have done, but to be honest - it is all him. He set a goal to be done by his 13th birthday and he was. We had to play the waiting game for paperwork to be signed off but he did it. I am glad it is over, but I am SO PROUD of my Eagle Scout and the hard work and dedication he has shown. His Court of Honor is June 26th and it will be a great celebration!

Where has the time gone??

Here it is March and I can't believe it has been so long since I blogged last. A couple of quick notes....

1. Hayden turned in his Eagle write-up last week and now we are just waiting for the Board of Review. I was THRILLED to have it finally out of this house and in the hands of the District Scout leaders.

2. I am now the mother of a teenager. Hayden turned 13 a couple of weeks ago and Cole turned 9. I have really been wondering where the time has gone. I love when my kids have their birthdays because I like to think about my life before and after they were born. I remember their labors and how amazing it was to look into their eyes for the first time, to instantly feel my heart exploding with love for them, and to know that just moments before they were in Heaven with our Father in Heaven. They are a gift to Sal and I from Him and I am thankful that he has loaned them to us for a time. In the blink of an eye, we are now years down the road and I realize that I only have a handful of years left with them. Honestly, I can't even think about it, because it will cause he to have an anxiety attack. I am just not ready yet to let them soar with their own wings.

Speaking of motherhood..... after 340 days I am FINALLY done breastfeeding. I have never nursed my babies this long and it is a day I have looked forward to. HOWEVER, it has been quite bittersweet for me. I honestly never thought I would feel this way. I am sad that I will never have another newborn baby in the house that is my responsibility. I will never nurse another baby. I will never have big boobs - leaking or otherwise - for Sal to enjoy. I will miss every single minute of it. Newborns are my absolute favorite.... I love being up with them in the night while the rest of the house sleeps....looking into their sweet face with only the glow from a dimmed light..... listening to them breathe while they sleep on my chest. YES I am having a moment... I am sad at all the things I will never do again. Funny that I will not miss maternity clothes or swollen feet, fertility hormones or progesterone injections for all of those things were needed to get me where I am today - a mother to 4 of the most wonderful kids ever. I am thankful for everyday that I have with them.

To Hayden, Cole, Olivia and Mason - I love you with all of my heart!!

Eagle Project Part 3

I thought I would just share a few of the pictures that President Moreno sent.

Here too is an email we received from President Moreno:

thank you for all your hard work and your big heart on put all this together, we feel pretty bless to know people like you guys but hope we are hopping to be friend forever not only church people, i want this since i was called as a branch president to know this kind of people willingly to help people in Mexico, i was thinking on a few things that we never get and sometimes we think that those things are not important but they are like personal cleaning items (shampoo, soap, toilet paper, toothbrush etc) that can be a HUGE help.

My parents are going back to Rocky Point this weekend and together with their friends we are sending TONS of food and hygiene items. We have decided this will be an ongoing project for us. Hopefully we can teach the people how to fish so they will not always need to be given fish.

Mariachi Festival

After making tamales all day, Sal and I took the kids to the Christmas Mariachi Festival. Sal and I had the best time but I think the kids were ready to leave after the first mariachi group played.

I LOVE mariachi music... I only wish I knew what they were singing about. One day I will have time to take a few Spanish classes, but for now I enjoy the beat and the voices. This year there was an all female mariachi group. Mariachi Reyna de-Los Angeles.

I really enjoyed listening to them, but there is something about the men.... perhaps it is their costumes that I love?? Just kidding.

One of our favorite mariachi group was there.... Mariachi Vargas, we truly could have left after they were done singing. They were the highlight of the night for us.

Sal and I decided that we would not take the kids again. Olivia fell asleep half way through the show, Hayden was playing games on his iTouch most of the night, and Cole screamed, "NO!!" when one of the groups came back for an encore. What can you expect when they don't understand the words to the music either. Maybe we all need Spanish lessons!

Annual Tamale Party

We once again had our annual tamale making party and as usual we had the best time every. Sandra was patient with those of us with babies - we took lots of breaks to nurse and put the down for naps. She said that next time she will bring her doll baby so she can have as many breaks as us. Mason and Slade are great friends and they were good to play on the floor. Mason had a ball pulling Slade's binky out of his mouth too.



Hayden wanted to be the mixer.... here he is mixing our masa, corn, cheese, baking powder, and salt.... of course Nana was close by to make sure Hayden was mixing it correctly.


What would tamale making be without BoSa donuts and Sonic drinks?? Sal, Heather and Jill cut up all the chili's and jalapeno's. I am not sure what I was doing other than taking the pictures..... oh yea, my job was whipping the Crisco and masa. This year we made about 35 dozen green corn tamales and they were the BEST ones we have ever made. We sure missed Manny and him telling us how to do our jobs. Thanks girls for the great time. I can't wait to do them again. Do we dare try them without Sandra's help??

Eagle Project Part 2

As I sit here and type this post, I am VERY aware of all the noises in my house at the moment. The dishwasher is going as is the washer and dryer and I just heard the heat click on. Today I am more aware of the humming of my house because we just had the most wonderful experience in Rocky Point.

This weekend was finally the day that we have waited for. We are delivering all of our donations to the people of Mexico. Granny and Papa and Mitzi and Clark left on Friday with their cars loaded to the brim. We left on Saturday and our Yukon was so full, we almost didn't have room for the kids. We were all worried about getting through the border, but our prayers were answered in that none of us were stopped. We were just waved through and we didn't have to explain or bribe anyone to let our items through.

We met President Moreno and his wife Ismelda at Burger King and after quick introductions we followed him to his house.






He has a beautiful house and we immediately felt warm and welcome there. We were ready to unload the items, but Guillermo (Pres. Moreno) insisted that we sit and eat. Guillermo's mom was also there from Mazatlan and they had made my favorite - posole!! They even had all the fixings - lime, radishes, cabbage, red onion. It was delicious!





We had the best time talking and visiting. We learned so much about the LDS branch and the Moreno's. Here is just some of what we learned:

1. 60% of the members of the branch are unemployed - 60%!! They are mostly construction workers that have no jobs because the building in Rocky Point is at a stand still, due to the lack of tourists. President Moreno said that they do anything they can for money including standing on the street corner washing car windows for money.


2. They have no Bishops storehouse or church welfare programs. They do collect a little bit for fast offering but not nearly enough for their needs.


3. Electricity is VERY expensive in Mexico. Pres. Moreno said he pays between $100 and $200 every month for electricity. The houses have NO heat. If they did their electricity bills would be nearly $700. Their house was cold and we had our coats on the whole time.


4. The youth in the branch want desperately to go to the temple in Hermosillo, but to do so they have to rent a bus to drive them the 3 hours. The bus rental is $1000. The youth of his branch had decided to try to earn the money by holding a car wash and a bake sale. Pres. Moreno said this might be possible to raise that much money in the States but in Mexico it is an unattainable goal. People do not have extra money to donate even if they get a car wash or a cake out of it.


5. The kitchens have no hot water. After dinner, we got up and said we would do the dishes. Of course there is not a dishwasher so we were going to wash the dishes by hand. I fiddled with the faucet for a minute and then asked how I could get hot water. Pres. Moreno giggled and said, "welcome to Mexico." At first I thought they were kidding and I looked like the stupid American, but I quickly realized they were not kidding. The water was ICE cold and I was thrilled when Mason started to cry so I didn't have to stick my hands back in the water.

After dinner we brought in all of our donations. We had a TON of stuff. I think we counted over 1000 articles of clothing.

Later as we sat on the couch Guillermo said, "I wish you could just stay and visit. I know you have tired kids, but I would love to just visit." He then invited us back for breakfast the next morning and we accepted.

At the end of the evening I presented President Moreno with a gift. The whole time we were doing Hayden's project, I had the thought... "Our hands are His hands" and the thought kept coming to me that I needed to give something to Guillermo and Ismelda to make them realize that we were just acting on behalf of Heavenly Father in doing and donating all that we had. To be honest, I shrugged off the thought a few times and right before we left, the thought came so strong that I had to run out and get what I needed for the gift. Luckily, I have Kara who did my vinyl at the moment I asked. Here it is:

It is all of our handprints and in Spanish it reads, "Our hands are His hands." As I gave it to Guillermo, he said he was going to cry. Right then and there the Spirit bore witness to me that Guillermo was a man of God, chosen to lead His people at this time and that we are truly His hands on Earth to do the work that He would do if he were here.

As we left that night, my heart was full of love for Ismelda and Guillermo and the people of Mexico. I felt as though we had not done enough. My wonderful Sal said, "Ali, don't think of it that way. We need to realize that we can do MORE." And we will.

Here is our family with Ismelda, Guillermo and Guillermo's Mom!

Only in AZ......

do we blog about the weather. Last night it rained and this morning we have FOG!! The kids LOVED it and it was such a nice change!

Hayden's Eagle Project - Part 1

It has been quite a while since I blogged last. We have been up to our eyeballs with Hayden's Eagle Project.

When Hayden turned 11 and went into the Boy Scout program the first thing he did was go through the book to see how soon he could earn his Eagle. He said, "Mom, I want to get my Eagle on my 13th birthday." He has worked hard and he will realize his goal in Feb. 2011.

As he thought about projects and what he could do, he asked what Cam and Colby had done for their projects. Colby didn't do one and Cam did his project in Rocky Point or Puerto Penasco Mexico. Hayden decided that he wanted to do his project for the people of Rocky Point as well.

It took a while for us to find a contact in Mexico. Granny works for the Church and she was able to give us the number to the temple president in Hermosillo, Mexico. I called and spoke to Sister Young. She gave me the number for her nephew who lives in Rocky Point. Hayden called him and got the number to one of the counselors in the branch presidency who happens to be the brother of the branch president. We then FINALLY got in touch with President Guillermo Moreno. He spokes very good English and he and Hayden were able to talk about his project and what kinds of things the people in Mexico need.

It was determined that the people were most in need of winter items. For example, sheets, blankets, winter clothes as well as dresses and white shirts and ties to attend church. He also asked if we could collect frozen turkeys. A turkey in Mexico costs between $50 and $70 EACH!!

Hayden was SO excited to get started. Unfortunately, we had a difficult time getting his project approved. Hayden had to jump through many hoops and convince many people that Mexico is a safe place and that we would not be in any danger by going. Hayden was told on more than one occasion that this would be a "difficult project" and perhaps he should "simplify it". Hayden was determined and would not change what he wanted to do. After nearly a month, Hayden finally received the sign off to begin. Granny printed nearly 1000 flyers and Hayden and his friends and fellow Scouts passed them out to everyone in our neighborhood as well as members of our ward.

We set it up to collect the donated items 2 weeks later. When November 20th came, I thought for sure we would be OVERWHELMED with the amount of donated items. That day, we picked up 3 bags and one turkey. To say that Hayden was disappointed is an understatement. He worried about how he would fulfil his promise to President Moreno with just 3 bags and 1 turkey. We assured him that we would have enough and would find a way to get the necessary items. We sent out emails and asked our family to clean out their closets for the necessary items. I emailed family and friends out of state and asked for donations. Hayden received over $100 in donations and he used that money to purchase items from Wal-Mart and Goodwill. Little by little, donations showed up. When it was all said and done he collected 1058 articles of clothing including blankets, sheets, ties etc and 8 turkeys.

Hayden had the Scouts come help him sort, fold and organize all of the items. I was surprised to see the boys trying on the clothes and being silly. Here are just a few of the pictures we took.



All of the items are ready to go to Rocky Point this weekend. We can't wait.

Mason's first quading trip.....

One thing I do love about winter in Arizona is the chance to get the quads out and go riding in the desert. This past weekend, we took the kids out for a short ride. We went to the track where is was easy enough for Olivia to ride on her own quad. She loved being able to ride by herself and she didn't like sharing with Ellie, but she was fine to give rides as long as she could steer.


Hayden is forever the helping big brother and would run to help Olivia when she was ready to start her quad.



This was Mason's first official ride in the desert. When he was born last year we were just wrapping up Little League and then it got too hot to ride. We didn't even ride at the cabin last summer. Mason loved being outside, but what he loved most of all was the cookies and chips. I can't imagine why he is in the 90th percentile for his weight.


I can't even remember what he has in his mouth here, but this is the BEST picture ever!!



Mason was so happy just to sit with Mom or Dad and it was nice for us to just be able to hang out and chat while the big kids rode.





I can't wait to have a weekend where we can go on the trails. Our life has been absolutely consumed with Hayden's Eagle project, which is a good thing, but a weekend to just enjoy the desert would be fun too.

Olivia FINALLY turns 5!

A few weeks ago, my beautiful Olivia turned 5. Since her two favorite friends had their birthdays in July and September, Olivia couldn't wait for her birthday to finally come. I am SO thankful that Heavenly Father blessed us with a girl. There is ALWAYS drama, but what should I expect from a princess like Olivia. Here are some funny things about Olivia:

Much to her brothers chagrin, LOVES Justin Beiber. Although Olivia thinks the words to this song are Damon, Damon, Damon not Baby, Baby, Baby.....


Today Olivia said the funniest thing. As we were getting in the car she said, "Mom, you're glittering."

Me: "I'm what Olivia?"

Olivia: "Glittering..... see this paper you left on the ground?" LOL





Olivia LOVES Barbies and this is how she sleeps every night:



Olivia LOVES her baby brother Mason.... she is almost smothering, but she loves to be the mommy and take care of him.






Last weekend we went to the nursery to pick out some new plants and a Mexican man was helping us. He spoke with an accent and Olivia said, "Mom, why does that guy speak Spanish?"

Me: "Because he is Mexican just like you."

Olivia: "Mom, I am NOT a Mexican. See my skin?? It is getting whiter!"

I tried to convince her, but I was unsuccessful. One day she will be thankful for her Mexican heritage or maybe just the nice tanned skin! ;o)

Two last things, she says she is not going to baptized nor will she grow up and have to have braces. Gotta LOVE having older brothers!!